“Some people don’t come home.” -Ryan Roemer age 5; eating breakfast and fingering a Journeys pamphlet he felt compelled to take home with him the children’s grief group the evening before…..
Sitting in the Daddy chair we made just over a year ago; nibbling a toaster stick like many other mornings. Ryan paused and stated a fact.
Wednesday morning, October 23…new grief hit Ryan….adding on to the old….
A year of living without hugs, laughter, presence…..
Our changed lives- he summed up in his one quiet statement…..profoundly new to his developing mind….
One doesn’t know how life will evolve. It just does.
Luke’s Type 1 Diabetes diagnosis shocked us on August 5, 2013
Trying to regulate his night time numbers in those first days felt like a bitter gamer was hacking in to my life account once again.
Changing my password– two seconds after I made up the best, most clever combination — hidden securely in some obscure tiny glass jar ….only to have it smashed open again and again and again.
Trying to keep him from going in to a middle of the night diabetic coma on a crash course….a new era…
Luke’s sudden onset has been attributed to the stress of grief.
Stress and grief.
Grief advocates tell you time and again- you integrate grief in to your life.
Rain storms add water to a lake.
We have added on to our lives more lessons- more awareness….more challenges….more gratitude….more love….
Not able to tell what drop is new and what was always there….it all combines.
Ryan’s words slipped out in to our dimly lit morning routine just as forcefully as Tony slipped out of this world.
You just never know.
He didn’t have to sit alone in that moment.
New grief—meeting Old abiding Love at the table we all shared countless moments.
July 30, 2012 we shared our last Ritter’s as a family at that table…ending the night with a round of thankful memories from each member…..
October 23, 2013. Luke pricks his finger for his morning blood test…. Ryan shares his heart….
New, Old, Grief…..
Immeasurable Love.
Love, Light and Miracles 